By Gil delos Santos
In great percentage, our circle defines our own persona. It's a classic that you "tell me who your friends are, I'll tell who you are". When we make friends with alcoholics for instance, we draw ourself closer to alcoholism. If we enjoy feasting on gossips with friends, we end up like them—marites who finds happiness and entertainment on other people's misfortunes or controversies. If we allow to take corrupt favors in exchange of convenience and friendship, we let ourselves become part of the system.
We inevitably absorb their mantra. We react from their energy. We react from their influence. We react from their mindset. Subconsciously, we become them in time...without knowing it.
This presents a level of great significance to filter who we engage with and which environment we place our selves in. Our peace and growth are dictated by the energy that surrounds us.
In another dimention, when we are surrounded by mentors that seek no validation but just to pay forward, their words come out intensely strong at times because it is intended to change you for the better. If we are that someone who sees growth is an integral part of building characters, you don't take their words being destructive that triggers your moral or self-esteem. Tough love is still love. Only people who refuse to grow will have a problem with it. A grateful child will never leave home to detest the discipline of parents. In cases like this, hurting words intended to shape you is love in action translated into words. You are not in a wrong environment, but you are rather in a wrong mindset. Leave your old self and be at the new you.
When it comes to cutting people in our circle, the decision should be gauged on the following factors:
❌️ No value-adding contribution
❌️ Suppressor of peace and growth
❌️ Enabler of chaos and negativity
We don't need to be a people pleaser in order to have a sense of belongingness. Choose your people. They make you who you are.
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