Life in a simple form surrounded by beaches is great...it's like living a semi-retired life in the island. Until this pandemic came into the scene real hard - offering thoughts to miss the spectacles of the high life, the city, the world travels, financial freedom, the champagnes, and all. Ironically, a realization set-in that we sometimes need to be a bit careful with what we wish for.
Wishes are product of keen focus put into action plus the conspiring universal energy, I thought. I remember wishing to see less Chinese and less Koreans in Boracay to give our old European patrons a chance. After that, the 6-months closure happened. Now, the pandemic. I should be careful with wishes.
In another world, it was the height of a beautiful career abroad when summoned by a situation to whether choose to come home to grant an aging mother's wish by leaving a sparkling profession behind...or be a selfish money driven son by not responding.
That point was a stage where career dreams only start to actualize with financial freedom just begins to materialize after years of professional hardwork. The force from the other side of the world was however more stronger - a mother's silent cry, than my personal goals. So I was home late of 2016.
It was a great 8 months being with her until something unexpected came so soon. She passed away on the day I was supposed to be travelling to Palawan for a 2-week holiday. Very sad...but she passed away smiling in my thoughts - the best view in my mind more than any other holiday destinations in the world. I vividly recall how much she laughed with my stories as I laugh with hers especially during that last lunch she sat beside me.
That's nowhere close to having multiple houses and luxurious lifestyle without spending moments like that with your mother.
After she's gone I realize that even in the busiest point of my professional life, I have actually wished for that opportunity. I remember how much I prayed to be able to spend real quality time with her before it could be too late.
For the chance to personally get up early to make her breakfasts to express the love and the care mothers deserve from a child they nurtured and supported all the way inspite of repeated failures AND to be around sharing laughs on her last days, I am a happy and a fulfilled son on that respect.
Now in the midst of this pandemic, I could only wish for a permanent sanity. It is a struggle to fight back the situation mentally, being surrounded with the circumstances you weren't ready for.
In reality, you could only wish but cannot revert.
Still currently struggling to get the high life back, but bigger wish is that...hope you're still around, mother.
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